Tripping into your Identity - Part 3

Chapter 6: The Fundamentals of Becoming Your Best Self

Peeing in Public

Before we get into specific tips, tricks, strategies, etc., on how to use psychedelic therapy effectively, I think it’s important to both establish and evaluate some of the steps most of us will likely need to take as we follow our paths towards recovery. I also think it’s important that we can actually recognize happiness when we experience it, or when we take important steps towards it, as many of us quite literally won’t know it when we experience it due to it feeling so foreign when we finally do.

Before continuing though, I’d like to offer a brief description of what I believe happiness is, as it can mean different things to different people. I believe that happiness is simply existing in a present state of living and moving forward with purpose and agency, instead of surviving in a state of stagnation and helplessness. Happiness does not necessarily mean that one is experiencing a permanent sense of overwhelming joy, comfort, motivation, bliss, delight, etc. Instead, it means that one is living in a state which is far more likely to frequently and consistently produce these feelings.

Now, this is one of my personal favorite ways to test the feeling of success in moving towards a state of happiness, though I very much doubt it can apply to everyone. Even so, I think it’s worth giving a try.

I believe that one of the secrets to happiness lies in understanding and feeling the process and result of overcoming stage fright while peeing…

I’m actually not kidding in the slightest. Stage fright while peeing is quite literally an inability to be vulnerable, get out of your head, and let go of the control you’re trying to exert over the situation. For most people with depression, this feeling will be incredibly familiar, as they likely experience some version of it in countless ways, every single day.

Your nervous system locks up as you enter your head and stay there; worrying about one thing or another instead of living in the moment and feeling your way through something as simple as peeing. “Why is this so difficult? Could something be wrong with me? Can other people hear me? Are they getting impatient? Do I even have to pee?”. Our minds are in the past and/or future while our bodies are screaming at us to be present and just get on with doing what needs to be done: peeing.

You know you have to pee, and peeing is undoubtedly what your body wants, but something inside you is making it feel impossible. There’s that internal schism; a breakdown in communication between the thinking and feeling self. In one way or another, you are not aligned with yourself in emptying your bladder. The momentary helplessness (anxiety) you are experiencing is prohibiting your nervous system from doing what it would otherwise accomplish with no effort whatsoever.

Many of us have been there, and I have to imagine that most people have successfully overcome the stage fright for long enough to get the stream started (making it easier for the feeling self to take over for the duration), even if it was far more difficult than they would have liked. For those who have overcome it before, take this opportunity to appreciate the advantage you have, as that process will come in handy and feel very familiar once you begin to experience the success of alleviating your helplessness, and achieving a better balance and relationship between the thinking and feeling selves.

So, while learning to overcome stage fright while peeing may not achieve the level of agency and happiness you’re ultimately aiming for, the process is almost exactly the same:

-Recognize an opportunity for achieving a better balance between mind and body (in this case, we almost certainly need to get out of our heads and into our bodies more)

-Reclaim agency by communicating between the two instead of living in one

-Profit

Manageable Challenge, Self-Love, Gratitude, and Celebration of Achievement

This is probably a good time to cover the practice of learning to challenge ourselves in ways we are ready to be challenged, as well as learning to love and appreciate ourselves for when we succeed, and refraining from beating ourselves up when we fail. This section is filled with goals/steps that the vast majority of us will need to take along our journey, even if the space between them looks wildly different for each of us.

I believe the best way to challenge ourselves and move forward is a four-step process.

Step 1: Set short and long-term goals. What are you hoping to accomplish in the near future, and how can that goal carry you toward the goals you have further down the road? Focus on the short-term goals, but ensure they are always in service to the long-term.

Step 2: Find a challenge, in pursuit of your short-term goal, that you are confident you are ready for, even if it’s so small that other people would make fun of you for considering it a challenge.

Step 3:  Utilize Informed Personalization - use the knowledge you believe will help you in achieving your goal (determine the steps you likely need to take), then personalize the process by using what you know about yourself in order to create the best chance for success (the space between those steps). What steps will you be taking to overcome the challenge you’ve decided to tackle? Will you take the steps recommended by others, use your own, or some combination? What, exactly, does your space between these steps look like? How will you motivate yourself to take these steps each day? How will you sustain moving from step to step?

This part is always a learning process (a skill), and requires a certain amount of failure. The goal is to figure out what works for you, and set aside what doesn’t, if only temporarily (it might work later). Keep in mind that, as long as you continue utilizing Informed Personalization (educating yourself on how to achieve what you want, then personalizing the process of moving through the steps you believe can lead you there), your eventual success is guaranteed.

Try to sell the process to yourself in a way that sounds fun, exciting, rewarding, and desirable. If that doesn’t work then, at the very least, try to sell it to yourself in a way that doesn’t sound absolutely miserable. It often helps to remind yourself of what you stand to gain in the long run by succeeding. It’s your process, so make it work for you. Remember, no one else can teach you how to live as yourself. You are the only person who can figure out how to improve your life, reclaim your agency, and leave your helplessness behind. No one else, myself included, can tell you exactly how to do it.

Step 4: Regardless of whether you succeed or fail, congratulate yourself for trying. Be grateful to yourself for moving forward, even if you tripped along the way. You are going to trip eventually, just like everyone else. I don’t care how insignificant and easy the challenge may have sounded to you or others, we need to practice gratitude and love for ourselves when we try to move forward in any way. Do not allow others to convince you otherwise.

As you read through the steps and information outlined in this section, and eventually move towards them yourself, it is absolutely critical that you place your starting lines wherever you need them to be. All of these things are skills, and we cannot hope to start in a pro league when we have little or no training. Start wherever you want, and move at your own pace.

The only rule we need to adhere to is that we are actually moving forward, and not just flailing our arms around while standing still. Flailing can often feel like moving, but it’s important to remember that the two are not at all the same. Avoid placing the entirety of your focus on what you are comfortable with and already know how to do well, as doing those things still requires energy, but will do little in helping you to move towards your goals if the things you need improvement on aren’t being addressed. If something is in our way, then comfortably sitting with what we already know will not result in growth. Remember, we need to run into our walls before we can see them for what they are, and learn to move past them. If we lean into fear and embrace the unfamiliar, we develop our ability to exercise agency over more and more of our lives.

For instance, perhaps I’m great at getting in a good workout, but terrible at doing it consistently. If I were to put all my focus and energy into getting an even better workout in an attempt to achieve better physical health, then I would be totally bypassing the things I actually need work on: consistency and sustainability. We need to figure out what’s getting in our way, not try to force ourselves past it by going harder at what we already know.

Taking even one baby step forward is better than flailing about for days, weeks, or months on end. Take the baby step, and fall flat on your face if necessary – it’s always better than standing still.

Physical health – Getting Your Body on Board

Did you groan after reading the title of this section? I don’t blame you, but this is going to be a critical step towards achieving happiness for the vast majority of people (if not every single person).

Here’s an undeniable fact: Your body needs certain things to function at its best. That fact should be obvious to all, but I cannot begin to count the number of times I’ve seen this crucial fact overlooked our outright ignored by doctors, mental health professionals, life-coaches, family, friends, etc. It boggles my mind and, to this day, I cannot understand how so many people get this part so wrong, or simply ignore it entirely. It may very well be the single most important factor in helping you to rid yourself of helplessness, and reclaim your agency.

Have you ever tried to lift an object well beyond your capacity to move and thought, “I know, I’ll think more strength into existence and lift it that way!”. Did it work? Of course not, because we are all ultimately beholden to the limits and realities of our bodies. The same thing applies to mental health. All the therapy in the world cannot get you to where you want to go if your body is not on board with the process. Despite the fact that I’ve been lucky enough to work with some extremely talented professionals in my life, I can’t recall any of them ever mentioning this undeniable fact.

Imagine for a moment that achieving happiness is equivalent to playing a song on a guitar, where your picking hand represents your body, and your fretting hand represents your mind. If you train and improve only your picking hand, then you can’t possibly hope to play the instrument properly and produce a song you’re happy with. Similarly, if you train only your fretting hand, then you will be severely limited in what you can achieve. We need to train both, and teach them to work in harmony with each other. If one is lagging behind, then the other will suffer as a result.

Poor physical health will decrease mental health, and poor mental health will decrease physical health, PERIOD. There is no getting around this, and we should not try.

Now, it’s important to remember that the limits and realities of our bodies are not always as obvious as they may first appear, but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist, or that we can just think them all away or ignore them outright. It is absolutely the case that, with some creativity, determination, knowledge, and problem-solving, we can overcome certain things we had previously assumed to be impassable limits of our bodies and minds, but as with everything in life, reality will check us eventually, and we must acknowledge and accept when it is happening.

So, what exactly are the core components of achieving the kind of physical health our bodies require in order to give us the best chance at achieving happiness? I believe they can be broken down into three categories.

1.      Physical Fitness and Nutrition – setting our bodies up for excellent metabolic health and homeostasis

2.      Medications

3.      Chemical Balance and Physiological Function (Hormones, neurotransmitters, nervous system, organ functioning, communication between systems, etc.)

All of these things are closely related to, and influence each other, but they are distinct enough that we can focus on and target each one in specific ways. Before we go any further though, please keep in mind that our goal is not to achieve perfection in these areas. Instead, the goal is to ensure that none of these things are standing firmly in our way.

So, let’s start with the first one:

Physical Fitness and Nutrition

We are starting with physical fitness and nutrition because they will improve literally everything our bodies need to achieve happiness, and even many of the things our minds need. For many people, achieving good physical fitness and nutrition (good metabolic health) will, on their own, remove most, if not all physiological issues that get in the way of our finding lasting happiness. Regular exercise alone has been shown to have a significantly larger impact on depression and anxiety than any other conventional, medication-based approach.

Poor metabolic health will, without exception, drastically decrease your ability to achieve good mental health. Poor metabolic health leaves your body and mind in a state of profound vulnerability to helplessness (anxiety and depression), and literally thousands of other mental and physical health disorders. Pursuing a path toward recovery without considering your metabolic health is like attempting to make a purchase without any money; it’s that important.

We’ll be covering some fundamental principles and techniques here, but if you would like to gain a more comprehensive understanding of how important metabolic health is to mental and physical health improvement, as well as how to effectively address it, then I strongly recommend reading Dr. Chris Palmer’s book, “Brain Energy”. If you have any reason to believe that your physical fitness and/or nutrition are holding you back (very likely), then don’t skip out on reading his book!

Alright, so what exactly is physical fitness?

Physical fitness, in the personal sense, is simply what your body is currently physically capable of, versus what it could reasonably and desirably be capable of with some improvement. We are not necessarily comparing ourselves to others here, as each one of us is very different from the next, and all of us are capable of different things. Remember that our bodies communicate with us constantly, and every time they fail to meet a physical demand which they reasonably believe could be met with some effort and improvement, they send us a message. If that message is ignored or excused often enough, our bodies and minds will experience helplessness, and suffer tremendously as a result, even if we don’t realize it.

Physical fitness, in the broader sense, is a state in which nothing about your body is standing in the way of your ability to pursue and live the life you want for yourself. Being “physically fit” is to achieve consistent homeostasis, and good metabolic and mitochondrial health. I won’t go into too much detail on each of these things, but a brief definition of each is useful to understand.

Homeostasis: A state of internal chemical and physical stability and balance. Achieving homeostasis is to achieve proper and stable function of our physiology.

Metabolic Health: Our ability to properly produce, utilize, and sustain effective and efficient energy throughout our bodies. Poor metabolic health has been increasingly demonstrated to be the primary cause, or significant contributor to a majority of the most common mental and physical illnesses. In short, metabolic health is how your body uses the energy you consume.

Mitochondrial Health: Mitochondria are intimately linked to metabolic health, and are responsible for a variety of things including, but not limited to, generating the majority of chemical energy required to power a cell’s biochemical reactions (regulating metabolic activity), regulation of certain functions of the immune system, and regulating the health and number of different kinds of cells. Achieving good mitochondrial health is to achieve proper energy production, cell maintenance, and several other important functions.

So, how does this all fit into our goal of achieving physical fitness?

Despite the fact that our bodies are not always reasonable with their desires and expectations of what we are capable of achieving physically, we would do well to pay attention to and trust what they ask of us, as the request is most often something we absolutely can achieve, if not come very close to. Even if we fail, we will learn something valuable about ourselves along the way.

Every time we put in the effort to meet these requests, no matter how small, our bodies send a powerful message of gratitude, pride, love, admiration, and fulfilment to us. Fulfilling these requests (when appropriate) also drastically improves our agency and relationship with ourselves, which is exactly what depressed people are lacking. Our bodies and minds absolutely require these messages on a regular basis in order to function well.

Remember, we are ultimately trying to rid ourselves of helplessness, increase our agency, and improve our relationship with ourselves. We cannot hope to discover and truly know our identities when we are at war with them. Ignoring our physical fitness and nutrition needs would be like refusing to communicate with a significant other and expecting the relationship to be happy and fulfilling. In this case, the significant other is ourselves, and we will undoubtedly come to resent and criticize ourselves when we fail to put in the work of building and maintaining a good relationship.

Okay, so where do we begin? How do we know what physical fitness looks like for us?

Well, what are some of the desirable things you know you could reasonably do with some extra effort, but that you currently cannot do? Maybe you want to get through an advanced yoga routine, clean your living space without feeling lightheaded or winded, go for a run or walk without experiencing pain in some part of your body, fit into an outfit that calls to your soul, eliminate random or extended bouts of brain fog, or simply improve your energy levels? The list is endless, and will vary tremendously from person to person depending on their current metabolic health. The point is not to target what others have accomplished (though this can be helpful in getting ideas and inspiration on what to try), but to instead figure out what you want, why you can’t currently do it, and what exactly is getting in your way. There will be plenty of failures along the way, but our bodies will still thank us for trying.

Luckily, the prescription for improving physical fitness will follow many of the same steps for almost every person, though the space between them will, of course, be unique to you. Before we go over them though, I think it’s important to remember the importance of truth and self-honesty here. Depressed people can be exceedingly good at convincing themselves they are perfectly happy with their current physical fitness level and, the further they perceive themselves from where they’d like to be, the more likely they are to engage in this cognitive dissonance. Ignoring the things your body wants from you will not bring you happiness - it will exacerbate your helplessness and internal schism, produce tremendous resentment and anxiety (often directed at and blamed on others), and get in your way constantly.

Both the empirical and anecdotal evidence of the dangers of regularly engaging in cognitive dissonance in regards to our physical health is overwhelming and undeniable, despite what many people will tell you. I went through this process myself many times and for many years, as did many of the people in my life. My body was far from what I wanted and knew it could be, I was ignoring or excusing much of it, resenting myself for what I knew I could change but wouldn’t, and my entire person was suffering as a result.

I can promise you that it is only when you achieve the physical fitness you desire will you be able to fully see just how deeply your body had been wishing it for you from the beginning, as well as the incredible healing effect it will have on you for pursuing and eventually attaining it. Not only that, but I can guarantee with 100% certainty that every single person who has yet to experience it will be shocked at the number of positive things a physically fit body can bring to their lives; things they didn’t even realize had anything to do with physical fitness.

Before I achieved it for myself, I couldn’t begin to comprehend what it would feel like, what it would allow me to do, and how happy it could make me every single day, throughout the entire day. Seriously, it was like opening an unending treasure chest full of unexpected goodies – it was awesome, and I can’t recommend it enough.

Okay, onto the steps.

Step 1: Find a nutrition plan that works for you

You can’t outrun bad nutrition, period. Poor nutrition can and will literally destroy your body and mind, no matter what. The best nutrition plan is one that you can stick to, makes you feel good in both the short and long term, and helps carry you toward your physical fitness and self-improvement goals; it’s a plan that helps you get to where you’re trying to go, instead of standing in your way. Maybe it’s a keto plan, or paleo, or carnivore, or something focused on balance, or some hybrid. What matters is that it serves your goals, fits your desired lifestyle, doesn’t get in your way, and helps you achieve good metabolic health. Dieting is not the ultimate goal, as a diet is essentially just a temporary measure. What we want are lasting nutrition habits and routines, not a temporary change in our eating habits.

My advice is to, once again, utilize Informed Personalization.

1. Set a self-improvement goal

2. Whether on your own, or with the help of someone knowledgeable in achieving the goal you’re aiming for, determine which steps you’re going to try taking to get there (the plan)

3. Start where you can NOW, and personalize the process to make it as easy, enjoyable, and sustainable as possible FOR YOU (your space between steps)

4. Self-educate (inform) yourself as you move forward and make progress

5. Use what you’re learning to make adjustments where they are needed, whether to the space between your steps, or the steps themselves. Keep what works, set aside what doesn’t (maybe try it again later)

The process will be easy for some, and difficult for others. Don’t compare yourself to others - just focus on yourself and what works for you. Focus on how you feel, and what you find yourself able to accomplish in regards to the goals you set out for yourself. Some version of this process will likely go on forever, as very few people find themselves able or willing to eat the exact same things, every day, for the rest of their lives. Luckily, the longer you do it, the more effortless it becomes, and the better you will feel! I promise you it’s not nearly as difficult as you might be imagining it to be, and you’re going to learn a lot, as well as make significant progress in developing your health and agency along the way.

I don’t want to dive too deeply into food specifics here, as this isn’t a fitness and nutrition book, but I feel a personal duty to warn you of the dangers of sugar and alcohol in particular. If you are consuming more than small amounts of sugar and/or alcohol on a weekly basis, you are likely going to cause serious damage to your body and mind (possibly permanent), almost without exception. This includes things like refined wheat flour and other simple carbohydrates that significantly spike your blood sugar and cause severe inflammation. Don’t take my word for it, try going a few weeks without any alcohol, and very little sugar (less than 30grams per day for most people) and see how you feel. The vast majority of people will experience benefits so drastic that it will feel as if you are a superhuman version of yourself, and I’m not being the least bit hyperbolic. Seriously, try it.

Step 2: Find an exercise routine that works for you

Our bodies need regular exercise, plain and simple and, aside from a total inability to move any part of your body, there are no exceptions, ever. The benefits of regular physical activity can be found in practically every single system in our bodies, including our hormones, mitochondria, and neurotransmitters – three things vitally important to feeling good and achieving happiness. We have evolved to require exercise, and absolutely nothing you do can circumvent this requirement. This doesn’t mean you need to hit the gym six times a week for 3+ hours a day - not even close. What it means is that your body needs you to move around on a daily basis, get your heart rate up, and physically challenge yourself in some way.

Again, the exact routine will look different for everyone. The point is to once again use Informed Personalization to educate yourself, find what works for you, and make a sustainable routine and habit out of it. The best advice I can give you here is to try finding one or more things you actually have fun, or at least don’t hate doing. Maybe it’s a walk around the block, yoga, lifting weights, playing sports, dancing, swimming, etc. If the activity meets the three requirements (move around, increase heart rate, challenge yourself) then it will help get you to where you want to go. I recommend trying to reach at least 30 minutes per day of physical activity, but it can take a while for many people to reach that goal. Start small, and don’t compare yourself to others unless competition motivates you to have fun and get more done.

While it’s not absolutely necessary, I also highly recommend incorporating at least two days of strength training per week. The benefits of strength training could easily fill several books, and include things like drastically improved metabolic health, self-confidence, agency, personal appearance, and overall quality of life. Once again, use Informed Personalization to help you determine what course of strength training, if any, will increase your chances of reaching your goals. More than likely, incorporating some form strength training into your routine will go a long way in helping you to achieve excellent physical and mental health, so it should not be overlooked.

It is often the case that, once we begin to introduce some of these new habits into our lives, other activities that we once loathed even the thought of doing will become immensely enjoyable and fulfilling to us. Start as small as you need to, even if it’s just a few minutes every other day. As long as you’re always moving forward, and not standing still, you will get to where you want to go. Experiment with different things to find something that is the least bit enjoyable for you. Do not criticize yourself when you inevitably fail along the way, and do not be afraid to throw out what doesn’t work. Just keep moving forward in some way.

I also highly recommend getting yourself some kind of fitness tracker, as they are incredibly easy to use and will provide you with vital information regarding how you physically spent your day. They can be personally motivating in ways you may not have expected, making it easier and more fun to meet your fitness goals. This obviously isn’t a requirement, but I still can’t recommend getting one enough.

Don’t concern yourself with getting one with all the expensive bells and whistles unless you have reason to believe that the additional information it provides will help motivate you. For most people, a very basic and inexpensive one will do the job just fine. I like to think of my fitness tracker as my physical health journal, as it serves many similar purposes relative to my mental health journal. For me, it’s that important.

My final piece of advice here is to stay out of your head before engaging in whatever activity you choose. Especially for depressed people, it is all-too-easy to talk/think ourselves out of doing something before we even begin. We excel at creating reasons not to do something, and convincing ourselves that our reasons are valid. Don’t think about it for more than a second, just move your body towards doing it.

One of my personal tricks that has helped me in more ways than I can count is something I call forced minimal effort. Here’s an example of what it has internally sounded like for me in the past:

My Brain: “I need to move around and get my exercise in for the day but I have less than no desire to. Okay, then just get up and do it for 2 minutes, then at least we’ll have done something for the day. But it sounds really difficu…NO, stop thinking about it, just stand up and run in place like a crazy person, right now, go. Okay, I’m moving… Wait, this actually isn’t the absolute worst feeling I’ve ever experienced in my entire life! Weird, cause I was sure it would be. Hmm, I think I could actually go for a few more minutes….”.

I can’t tell you how many times this has worked for me, and in far more ways than just exercise. What many people don’t realize is that, once your body begins to move and tire from exercise (or many other things, for that matter), it actually becomes impossible to exist solely in your thinking self, which makes it that much easier to continue doing what you’re doing and listen to and develop your relationship with your body. Practice it often enough, and it becomes… ENJOYABLE!? Who would have thought that we get better at things we practice, and that we enjoy the things we’re good at? Crazy.

This is one of the many reasons why exercise is so incredibly important - it teaches us how to stay out of our heads, and demands that we feel our bodies. When we become familiar with the process, we learn how to do it on command. We are essentially just committing to spending quality time with our bodies. This also teaches us how to engage in things we don’t feel like doing, even when we’re depressed. We bypass our negative creativity by simply moving our bodies as if they are being controlled by some unstoppable force of will and we have no choice but to move. Just pretend you’re possessed and have no say in the matter!

Medications

I lost count of the number of medications I tried during my journey through depression but, if I had to estimate, I would guess the number is somewhere between 50-70, and included things like anti-depressants, anxiolytics, stimulants, nervous system depressants, and even anti-psychotics. The sad truth is that the most commonly prescribed medications to treat depression and anxiety are unimaginably detrimental to your chances of achieving lasting improvement, and can easily make things much, much worse. I did not come to this conclusion quickly – it was the result of thousands of hours of research, personal experience, and conversations with others who have experienced one or more of these medications.

Most depression and anxiety medications simply do not, and cannot address the root cause of the symptoms they treat. Instead, they simply make the symptoms more tolerable. Worse, most of them ultimately achieve the same thing, they forcibly quiet and pacify our feeling selves to the point of being unable to communicate with us at all; they silence us. So, if our ultimate goal is to develop our agency, learn how to listen to and communicate, as well as develop a loving relationship with ourselves, then one of the worst things we can do is take a medication that increases our helplessness and removes our ability to hear what our bodies are trying to say to us. This would be like agreeing to work out an issue with a spouse by talking it out, then slapping some duct tape over their mouth, tying them up, putting them in a closet somewhere, and expecting it to go well. It’s not going to go well, and they aren’t going to be happy with you afterwards…

Now, it would be unfair of me to make the assertion that this is always the case for every single person – it isn’t. While I believe that something close to 90% of all anxiety and depression meds are unnecessarily prescribed, there are absolutely people who can benefit from them. Some people are simply so thoroughly suffocating in helplessness, and so disturbed by the severity with which their bodies “scream” at them, that they stand little chance at making progress without something to temporarily reduce that severity. For these people, the medications can provide them with “borrowed” agency, and an opportunity to actually introduce them to themselves without being torn to shreds. So, for those people who are so thoroughly removed from and/or tormented by themselves, they may require the noise-dampening effect that some medications can provide.

Having said that, I must warn you that continued use of these medications after progress has been made will, more often than not, get in your way. Once we establish an understanding and agreement with our feeling selves to move forward together, and are no longer at each other’s throats, the medications are extremely likely to hold our feeling selves back and reintroduce helplessness.

At some point, our feeling selves will get stuck, and we will be too far away to communicate and cooperate with them to the extent we need to if we are to keep moving forward. We cannot effectively communicate with overly-numbed versions of ourselves. Once again, this will not apply to every single person, but it is absolutely a reality that the majority of people taking these medications will contend with at some point. The ultimate goal is to develop our agency and a loving relationship with ourselves, not with the permanently medicated and pacified version of ourselves.

It is often the case that people suffering from depression will not commit to doing anything about it until they find themselves within smelling distance of the final edge – resigning to a life of total misery, or giving up on it altogether. In that moment, they can choose to stay standing still and slip into darkness, or they can move and take the first step towards recovery. The first step is always the hardest, and there will be a lot of first steps along the way. For people who have truly experienced what it feels like to be that close to the edge, and to be forced to make what could be their final decision, it is likely that they are so thoroughly disconnected and in conflict with themselves that medication may be their only means of taking the first step out of utter helplessness.

I do not fault these people, and I do not believe that medication is simply bad altogether, even if it often carries a severe risk of making symptoms, including suicidality, worse. I believe that medication should be a last resort, and that taking it to help you ignore what your body is saying to you will almost always result in a worsening of the core issues which, in turn, is likely to result in more medication. Please try to avoid this trap if at all possible. It’s very easy to convince ourselves that we need medications, particularly since they are often sold to us as quick and easy fixes. There is no such thing, and there is no shortage of psychiatrists who are happy to prescribe them forever because they don’t know what else to do, and the clinical data and literature many of them have come to rely on (often thoroughly corrupted and unreliable) demonstrates significant symptom reduction in some people. For most people though, there are much better options, including psychedelics!

Chemical Balance and Physiological Function

As stated in the physical fitness and nutrition section, many of our chemical imbalances will correct themselves as we begin to work on these areas but, for some, we will need to do a little bit more to get to where we want to be.

The chemicals in our brains and bodies are so unbelievably powerful and influential in practically everything we do, that an imbalance can upset the entire system, and make it a literal impossibility to achieve the lives we yearn for, regardless of how often we exercise, engage in therapy, journal, practice mindfulness, etc.

Take dopamine, for instance: A dysfunctional adrenal system can prevent you from feeling motivated to do just about anything, as well as prevent any feeling of reward or achievement for when you do. And that’s just one of many critically important chemicals in your body.

Since our bodies naturally excel at finding homeostasis on their own, the real key to achieving it is to figure out what it is we’re doing to upset that natural process. Of course, there can always be outliers outside our control, whether it be genetics, advanced autoimmune disorders, physical and psychological injuries, or a variety of other things, but many of these things can be addressed and corrected, or at least significantly improved with proper guidance and practice. Regardless of what it is that is ultimately getting in the way of your achieving homeostasis, the first step is to find it.

Since this isn’t a specific medical advice guide, I believe the best advice I can give you here is to first find a qualified functional and/or integrative medicine practitioner whom you trust. Functional medicine is the practice of finding the root cause of whatever ailments you are suffering from, instead of simply treating the symptoms of those ailments. It is important to determine where your imbalances lie, and what is causing them, and that is exactly what functional medicine practitioners are trained for and tend to excel at.

Since all of us will undoubtedly have our own unique set of issues and treatments for dealing with them, it would be a waste of time to try and cover them all. Instead, I think it could be beneficial to list a few of the most common causes of significant homeostasis and metabolic health disruption, as eliminating these things from our lives will make it significantly easier to figure out what is getting in our way, if not outright correct the issue.

Generally speaking, by far the most common causes of chemical disruption in people are:

Consuming things in excess, insufficiently, or both.

This could be exercise, screen time (phone, tv, computer, etc.), nutrition, our social habits, etc. If we want our bodies to achieve chemical balance, then we must become mindful of what it is that reliably and consistently throws us out of balance.

Poor nutrition is arguably the leading cause of falling out of homeostasis and ruining metabolic health, and the vast majority of Americans, across almost all ages, are suffering from it. If you are regularly consuming large amounts of sugar, refined carbohydrates (white flour, bread, snacks, pasta, cereal, etc.), vegetable and seed oils, highly processed foods, excessive plant-based foods, or alcohol, then you are very likely suffering from poor metabolic health. Unfortunately, even small amounts of these things can ruin our metabolic health, depending on many different current and past health factors.

Unfortunately, nutrition science and knowledge are currently in a state of utter corruption and mis/disinformation, so finding a trustworthy professional can be exceedingly difficult. If you have any reason to believe your nutrition may be negatively impacting your life (highly likely), then I strongly recommend you try a gut detox and repair regimen, along with adopting some kind of elimination nutrition plan. Keto and carnivore nutrition plans, in particular, have demonstrated remarkable results when it comes to drastically improving physical and mental health in a very short period of time, despite what many “experts” will claim. The results speak for themselves.

The process of improving your metabolic health may take some time, but the potential benefits of doing so are astronomical and undeniable. If you’d like to learn more about gut detoxes and repair regimens, or the keto and carnivore nutrition plans, then YouTube is a great place to start. Here is a short list of highly-recommended channels to start with:

1. Dr. Shawn Baker

2. Dr. Ken Berry

3. Thomas DeLauer 

4. Dr. Don D’Agostino

5. Dr. Paul Saladino

There are many other excellent channels and experts out there, but this list should at least help you get started.

So, what if poor metabolic health doesn’t seem to apply to you? What then?

Well, there is one thing that a literal majority of people today consume in overwhelming excess, and that thing is social media and screen time. This includes things like Tik Tok, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, YouTube, etc. You may want to stop reading after this section, as I’m sure this will be difficult for many people to hear, but I urge you to continue and attempt to consider what I’m about to say.

For too many reasons to name, many having nothing to do with chemical balance, social media is perhaps the most destructive thing to ever grace our civilization. This isn’t to say it should never be used, or that nothing about it is positive, rather, it could reasonably be likened to a drug that, when taken frequently and in more than small doses, is practically guaranteed to negatively impact almost every single facet of your mind, body, and life. It is unimaginably toxic to your physiology, to the way you think, to how you perceive things, to your self-love and worth, to your ability to determine truth, and countless other things. Perhaps worst of all, it achieves the destruction of your being while making you think and feel that you actually love and benefit from it; it convinces you that you both need and cherish it, and that it provides value to your life.

I don’t make this statement lightly, but I can promise you that if you are engaging in any form of social media on a daily basis for extended periods of time, you are extremely likely to eventually do tremendous and potentially irreparable damage to yourself and your identity. Excessive social media use is effectively a lethal dose of identity poison shot directly into your veins, and is particularly toxic to children and young adults who don’t possess the skills required to manage their use of it in a healthy way. For many people, even an hour per day is enough to cause serious damage. Again, don’t take my word for it, there are countless studies corroborating across multiple disciplines that prove this to be conclusively and undeniably true. The evidence is absolutely overwhelming.

Is it a coincidence that depression, anxiety, identity crisis, self-harm, etc., have absolutely skyrocketed to unheard of levels since the invention of the smart phone and the inception of social media, and have correlated with the increase in their use almost perfectly, over many years? Engaging with our phones, tablets, PC’s, etc., for hours on end, absolutely cripples our ability to utilize dopamine (among other things) effectively. As I stated earlier, a dysfunctional adrenal system is all but guaranteed to prevent us from or, at the very least, drastically reduce our ability to feel motivated, happy, excited, energetic, rewarded, etc. The chemicals required to feel those things either aren’t sufficiently present in our bodies, or we have become so desensitized to them that we can no longer benefit from them in the ways we are supposed to.

Unfortunately, this applies to addiction of practically every kind, not just social media. If you’re playing video games or binge-watching TV for multiple hours each day, you will experience anxiety and depression eventually, period. If you’re obsessing over the news for multiple hours each day, you will experience anxiety and depression eventually, period. If you’re shopping on Amazon for multiple hours each day… I think you get the point. Excessive use of any of these things will both cause depression and anxiety, as well as make them significantly worse. They produce feelings of helplessness and disconnect us from ourselves, and there is no getting around it.

All of these things simulate the experiences we have when engaging in activities that typically require a significant investment of both time and effort, and that is exactly what’s missing in so many of the things we engage with today: time and effort. Human beings are incredibly good at creating convenience, and absolutely terrible at living with it. If something gives you a feeling of reward, but you can experience that feeling often without doing much to get it, then it is likely to eventually cause you serious harm.

I am deadly serious when I say that, if you are addicted to and consume in excess anything that frequently and conveniently gives you feelings of reward or pleasure without much or any effort, then it will not be possible for you to achieve or even pursue lasting happiness without first correcting the addiction. Your brain simply will not cooperate with you, period. I know it sucks, but it is an absolute and unavoidable truth.

Now, before moving onto the next section, I think it’s worth noting that, no matter how well informed we are, how many tests we take, how smart and competent our doctors and therapists are, etc., we cannot hope to get a perfectly complete view and understanding of our physical health. There’s only so much we can do, and it would be unwise to obsess over trying to achieve flawless physical health in hopes that physical health alone can take us wherever we want to go. We can only ever do our best and, fortunately, that is all that’s required, as our “best” will improve with every step we take.